Past, Chapter 3: The 5-dollar Crush (Part 1)

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
Coz I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
~Crush by David Archuleta~

Foreword: This is an account of the past and does not in any way reflect my current status.

Many people asked me online whether I have a crush on someone because of the emo messages I have on my messenger profile. I always answered a flat 'no' although deep inside there always has been. I feared the awkwardness if it were to spread, as well as the possibility of a soured relationship if she were to know. I'm not gonna reveal who she is here (only 2 other people, perhaps 3, know about this), too bad.

To me a crush is a strong feeling of attraction towards someone. You just wanna be close to her, yet you don't want the person to ever find out that you like him. It was not a 'love at first sight' kind of crush, in fact, I didn't quite like her from the start. I could still remember the time when we were grouped together during civics and she gave me the 'I despise you' kind of look and laughed at every small mistake I made. From that day on, I prayed that I would never ever get to sit anywhere near her again.